Reflection...

Haven't blogged for a while >< but horray exams are over! - for the meantime. =.=

Anyway, just got into a fight with my mum TT...there were tears and such and now just reflection- well that's all i've been able to do - don't feel like doing much except to sit and think. Stare into blank screen and let the thoughts flow to my finger tips. ...funny eh? how after a fight...you feel completely drained, exhausted, unmotivated to do anything besides resolve the inner turmoil going on within you and to cry out your pain ....i've noticed that you feel so much better after crying-besides those uncontrollable 'hiccup' sensations you get after- but it helps seriously. You should never be ashamed/afraid to cry.

I wonder what must be going on in her mind? or perhaps shes just resumed back to watching her tv dramas as per usual- shutting herself completely from the outside word and reality; us.. her children. You must thinking..what prompted this fight? It's stupid really. It started off as an argument about mobile phones and then it turned into something ugly.Funny how the simplest of matters can escalate and turn into something so big; a revaluation of friendship, trust, relationship...love - something hurtful.

And don't you hate it how.. after a fight with your parents, there is this awkwardness that pervades while there's this 'cooling off period' that exists, making confrontations even more awkward? Well she is returning to HK tomorrow so I guess that will act as a cooling off period... -also you've got nowhere else to go besides your room... it's like your trapped there for eternity.. because the house appears to be their territory/domain.

The thing is, she just doesn't understand me. No matter how hard I might try. And it's hard to convey to her how I feel.. why I've done the things I have; it's like those feelings you get when your about to confess to your parents that you've lied to them... or when you've been called into the deputy's office out of the blue.

I guess it's just teenage anxiety- self obsessed teenagers with their constant evaluation of every aspect in their lives.
I'll leave it at that. Hopefully many of you have better relations with your parents. Time is a great healer, and with time relations will heal and friendships will mend. Life is too short to worry; to form hate within you, to hold resentments against your friends because of previous quarrels/misunderstandings.

Everyone should put their grievances behind them and live life in the present, looking towards the future...

Wow I must say, spilling your thoughts onto a page does take a load off. Although it must sound like i'm rambling ...meh.

I feel much better now.